If you’ve been reading this blog for a couple of years, you are prepared for what comes next. And I don’t mean the end of the world according to the Mayan calendar. You’re reading this, right?  No, it’s time for a new and ridiculous Booklover Carol.  You’re not prepared?  Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

Every year for the last three, I’ve produced a carol or two about the book biz.    Last year I treated you to Borders, the Bookstore, and Manuscript is Comin’ to Town.  In 2010 we had The Little E-Reader and I’ll Shop There for Christmas.  2009 brought us too many to recount, here and here.  Can you tell I’ve had fun?

This year I restrained myself and stopped at one.  Please sing with me:

HERE COMES AMAZON (sung to the tune of Here Comes Santa Claus.)

Here comes Amazon, here comes Amazon
Right to your front door,
UPS or US postman
Bringing books and more
Doorbell ringing, VISA singing
Profits on the rise
So clear a space ‘neath the Christmas tree
For Amazon’s latest prize.
 

Here comes Amazon, here comes Amazon
With your favorite tome
You made a wish list for your friends
So they could shop at home
Don’t need Santa or Old St. Nick,
Computer did it all
So stick the box ‘neath your Christmas tree
‘Cause Amazon came to call.
 

Here comes Amazon, here comes Amazon
Without a reindeer sleigh
All the things you ever wanted
One “enter” key away
Peace on earth will come to all
If Amazon prices it right
So let’s give thanks to *Bezos himself
‘Cause Amazon comes tonight.

(*That, of course, refers to Jeff Bezos, Amazon’s CEO and not Beelzebub.)

Happy Holidays!